An Open Letter to Discover

Re: this stupid ad: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=08bAl2bqb0w

Dear Discover Card,

Please cancel my account. As a proud American, I don't want to be identified with anyone who would pass up a chance to visit the white house over stupid political nonsense, let alone over what appears to be just plain racism.

I understand some of the appeal: Tim Thomas overcame a terrible career as a talentless NHL goalie throughout his prime, and has since put up stellar numbers in his late thirties that would have been impossible without steroids. It's clear that he has no fear of a black rubber hockey puck, or of needles, and I can see wanting to associate your brand with that courage.

However, his fear of a Black president makes him a terrible choice for a corporate representative. Tim Thomas' bigoted, ignorant, rude decision not to visit the White House with his team after the Bruins bullied their way to last year's Stanley Cup championship is a reflection of such low character that it reflects badly upon anyone who uses your card.

Worst of all, Discover's new ad campaign portrays this drug-abusing hatemonger as somehow desirable to women, and I'm afraid that if I take out my discover card in public again, people might think that I, too, hold such a low opinion of women.

Thanks for the tiny crumbs of "cash back" over the years that always felt like such a genuine apology for your usurious interest rates and your always-surprising, cleverly hidden finance charges. Thanks for your purchasing power at a fraction of the stores I wanted to shop at. Thanks for taking a nonexistent risk after reading my credit report to lend me a tiny amount of money at an immense profit. I appreciate all you've done for me. However, this ad campaign is incompatible with my patriotism and my belief in the self-evident truth that all men are created equal.

Goodbye, Dicover. Write to me when you sort out your issues. I hope one day we can be friends, and that one day when I see someone else pull you out in the checkout line, I won't be sick. Until then, please send me my last bill and lets get this over with.

Sincerely,

Eli Resnick